Book Launch Nightmares ... by C.L. Beck

© C.L. Beck, 2009

Not to do self-promotion here, but … okay, so maybe just a little self-promotion … my co-author, Nichole Giles, and I have our very first book launch coming up on Wednesday, Dec 9, 6-9p at the Barnes and Noble, in Orem, UT. I’m calm about it. No nerves at all. Just nightmares all night long, and dry heaves during the day.

Recently, several of my author friends have held book launches. That's very exciting, and since I've heard horror stories about book launches gone awry, I’d like to offer my jealous envy sincere congratulations to friends who’ve managed to live through one.

Even though I’ve never done a launch before, I have a pretty good idea—due to warnings by friends and the nightmares I've been having—what the top ten worst fiascoes would be for me.

1. The bookstore orders my book, but instead receives seventy copies of "Tales of a Stripper."
2. The bookstore parking lot is closed off for resurfacing at one end and to accommodate the new In and Out Burger at the other.
3. Aaackk! I’ve shown up in nothing but my underwear.
4. I made it to the store in one piece, I remembered to bring a tablecloth and I'm signing books ... at a table in the restroom.
5. Aw, drat, I forgot a pen and all that’s on hand is a crayon.
6. Umm, I’m sure I knew it once upon a time, but I have no clue what my name is.
7. Cramp, cramp, I have a cramp in both hands.
8. Gas, gas, I have really bad gas. I should not have eaten that double bean burrito.
9. I’m signing two doors down from Sarah Palin.
10. The power has failed and it won’t be on again until morning.

So, wish me luck, dear friends, and if you get a chance, stop by to say hi on December 9 at the Orem Barnes and Noble. I promise I’ll be wearing something more than just my underwear.

What's playing in my head: The Restroom Door Said Gentleman by The Bob Rivers Comedy Corp.


LAST WEEK'S WINNER : Congrats to CATHY WITBECK on winning the Baskin Robbins gift certificates. Cathy, please contact me no later than midnight on Wednesday, Dec. 9 to claim your prize. Send me an email with your mailing address and phone number at cindybeck(dot)author(at)yahoo(dot)com. Or at any other address you might have for me.

If the prize isn't claimed by Wednesday, a new winner will be drawn.

A 2010 Greg Olsen calendar, autographed in gold ink by the artist himself—with his own hands—while I stood watching nearby.

THE PRODUCT: Greg is a fantastic artist and his paintings are filled with light and warmth. The calendar is beautiful.

MY OPINION: Ooo, somebody tell me again ... why did I ever tell Greg I'd give this calendar away, instead of keeping it for myself?

HOW TO ENTER: Leave a comment on this article. Any comment you want. I'll choose one, for whatever reason as determined by my little pea brain. Or possibly by Corky Porky Pie's little dog brain, which is significantly smaller than a pea.

Deadline to enter is by midnight Friday, December 11.

Winner will be announced no later than Monday, December 14.


ali cross said...

I *LOVE* this! Cindy this is most awesome! I'm sure your signing will go great ~ especially since you've been so careful to list the worst things to avoid. :D

Rachelle Christensen said...

Ha, ha! Good luck!
I don't know how you can be so nice to give away your calendar. I'm keeping mine so I don't need one. :)

Danyelle Ferguson said...

LOL! Signing in the restroom, eh? Since the majority of book-buyers are women, I think that would work out well. You'd have quite the captive audience to talk to while they made use of the stalls. =)

JoLyn Brown said...

LOL! I wouldn't have even thought to be worried about some of those things. I hope that everything goes well for you! I will see you Wednesday at the book launch.

Unknown said...

I'm surprised that one of your fears wasn't the most obvious, i.e. that no one shows up!!!
Hope this DOESN'T happen 1000 fold.

Taffy said...

Good luck! I doubt anything bad will happen...except maybe Sarah Pallin or gas. LOL

I posted your contest on my blog.


C. LaRene Hall said...

I'd do almost anything for one of those calendars. I'd even buy one if I knew where they are. Good luck on your book launch - I promise you'll have lots of fun.

Triple Nickel said...

Is this like launching a ship? Do you hit the book with a bottle of champagne?
Good luck and may all you nightmares NOT come true!

Karlene said...

Good luck on your signing. I so wish I could be there but I have family in town that night. Maybe I can make it to one of your other signings.

Slamdunk said...

Ahhh I am sure you will have great fun with the event--congrats. The signing table in the restroom would be a bit of a stinker though...

Taffy said...

I shouldn't have said anything about 'gas'. I meant that would happen to me!

Kathi Oram Peterson said...

So I read this on the 10th. I'm wondering how it went because knowing you, your book launch was very successful especially with the two of you to pool your sources. I wish you much success!!!