That's When the Fight Started

Photo by Wayne Short, ©Wikimedia Commons


My friend and fellow writer, C. Larene Hall, sent me this in an email, and I couldn't resist sharing. Hope you laugh as much as I did! Drop off a comment and tell me which one was your favorite.


And That's When the Fight Started ...


One year, a husband decided to buy his wife a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift. The next year, he didn't buy her a gift. When she asked him why, he replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"

And that's when the fight started...

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I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?" It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.

"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.

So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

And that's when the fight started...

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I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."

He said, "Aren't you worried about mad cow?"

"Nah, she can order for herself."

And that's when the fight started...

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My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping the channels. She asked, "What's on TV?"

I said, "Dust."

And that's when the fight started...

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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 200 in about 3 seconds."

I bought her a bathroom scale.

And that's when the fight started...

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When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, my book, my car, playing golf. Always something more important to me.

Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I thought I was being clever at her foolishness when I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway, so here, you can use this."

And that's when the fight started...

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My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table. I asked her, "Do you know him?"

"Yes," she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."

"My gosh!" I said, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

And that's when the fight started...


------Author unknown------